It is 4:00 in the afternoon and I just got off the phone with my Mom. Now, I am feeling like my usual self again. I dread afternoons… If only I can, I will choose to skip forward the next day when the sun is up so I can escape another day. But of course I can’t do that… I am only human. Yes, I am. I always say that… I know it is a cliche, but is a phrase that says the best of everybody. Human: Subject to Imperfection.

Just recently, my brother’s wife asked why I am not my happy self lately. I am an open book to people that know me well most specially my family. Indeed the more I open up, the more I get too vulnerable. I am so far different from the person I was before. I won’t blame anyone for my misery… I never did that before and would never do that in a million years. At times like this, I am thankful I am married to someone so wonderful. It doesn’t take a lot of words for him to understand. I know his feelings the same way he knows mine…

It is funny how sometimes when we get home, we would sit on the car for some seconds. Then he would turn his face towards me and we’d stare at each other briefly. And instead of opening the doors, he would turn his ignition on and before we know it, we’re back on the roads heading somewhere…

Even if life is beautiful, it can be pretty challenging don’t you think? And most often, you find yourself lost just trying to find your way towards happiness. When the road gets so tough, you tend to forget the simple things that make the journey worth traveling. You will wonder why you have to walk on thorns when you can leap to avoid being pricked. You will question yourself why you have to continue when you can actually choose another path…

At the end, I hope to understand how this life works better. When I gain new allies to replace the friends I lost along the way. When I earn myself a stable, stronger, more determined personality above what used to be me. The most fulfilling part of it all is when I will be immersed on a community that nourishes and inspires me unconditionally. Yes, my vision in life is simple. Not for me to make hundreds of dollars in a day nor to be famous for something I don’t really care about. No, not even a mansion on the hill. I want something personal in nature. And I have a long list of what they are. And as I continue living life everyday, I learn more about prioritizing what needs to be done, to ignore and let things fly off my shoulders. To turn my back when I get hurt. Not to play the victim after a struggle… to retain my composure so I can execute a graceful exit when I have to.


My Project 360 for today is a snapshot of me and my daughter when I took her out for a photosession.
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