We are so fond of Vegas that we come here ever too often. We actually would like to get a home here in the next year if God permits. I love the fun and endless sleep… and yes, I am now becoming upfront about not liking it much in California. California is California, there is no place as beautiful as it is. I just don’t like Alyssa growing up to a place where she people think she cannot do anything right. C’mon, she is just a kid. Give her a break. Whenever it’s just the three of us, Alyssa behaves a hundred times better. I guess that’s one reason why I get so frustrated because “the others” would actually find satisfaction when they see her throwing tantrums. And when Alyssa is on her quiet moods, they would say smart-mouth comments like: “Bakit ang bait mo ngayon ha?” Excuse me.

These are factors driving me away every single day. I feel like nobody deserves to be pushed around and be under someone so domineering and manipulative. I wouldn’t… and I don’t want Alyssa to be around other people who are just so inconsiderate. Those ones who talk without even thinking what the others might feel. Or those ones who says all flowery things when around you, and stabs you in the back when you aren’t looking. Very irritating. I don’t need them to make me feel down… I haven’t been inferior and if their goal is to make me one, I am sorry to say but I don’t welcome the thought – not even a fragment of it.

Oh, the negativity. It is very alienating. Even if I try not to think about it, it sure can creep and finds its way to my mind.